One year ago as a new nurse graduate, I have experienced some uncomfortable remarks, touching and things of that nature that has caused a lot of concern from an emergency room doctor. Since i did not respond to the remarks and did not give this person more to go on, I have experienced some hardships when working directly under this doctor.

He does things like place excessive orders, in a fashion that makes my life more difficult (ordering meds 5-10 mins apart meaning that i make multiple trips to the med room instead of just one or two). He has a bad attitude towards me and seems to do things to make me upset. i haven’t said anything to anyone thus far (being a new nurse and fearing that it could mean the end of my job or making my life miserable there) but i can’t stand by and let this happen.

What should I do?

Their relationship was close, and rightly so.

At work, the emotional bond between this man and this woman grew.  Before long, it appeared closer than the bond each had with their respective spouses.  Then it happened.

One wanted to take the relationship to the next level, a physical level-but the other did not.

The nurse who refused the relationship divulged everything to the spouse at home. The guilt was enormous, and animosity between the two at work grew.  Soon management entered the picture.

Even though nothing had occurred at work that would have been perceived as inappropriate, management asked the nurse who refused the overture to move on from their position.  All the while the other nurse involved kept their position.

How is this right?

If both had engaged in something physical at work, obviously they would have both been fired.   But their work was never a factor. Why was one nurse-who seems to have made the right choice-forced out while the other was allowed to remain?

Ethically, what do you think should have been done in this case?  Has your unit faced a similar scenario? How did your management respond? How did you respond?

I took care of her for two days in a row. At first she seemed pleasant, and we got along well. We have daughters the same age and live in the same city.

At the end of the first day, however, she started to become somewhat needy. There were frequent calls. Things were seemingly going wrong every hour or so: an IV pump would mysteriously be on hold and alarming, or her pain medicine wasn’t working.

The second day started off fine, and she shared with me some of the issues she was having with members of her family–specifically problems surrounding a hurtful letter that had been sent to her by a family member, which made terrible assumptions about her health condition.

For 20 minutes I listened and reassured the patient. However, the same needy behavior occurred and increased (pain, nausea, pressure, nausea, pain, fatigue, nausea, reflux, pain, pain, nausea).

Don’t get me wrong: I take my patients very seriously, and I do what I can to make them comfortable. But she needed me for every little thing. By the end of my shift, I had become so frustrated by what seemed to be attention-seeking behavior that I decided to set limits in a firm but professional way.

Thankfully, a few days later when I returned to work, she was not in my assignment.

Recently, I found out that this patient complained about me, not only to the other nurses but also to the hospital’s patient relations department. It got filtered down to me through my manager, who rallied behind me.

In her two-page complaint, the patient stated that after she showed me this “letter” I began to treat her differently. She said her pump was alarming and I was talking in the hall to another nurse and ignored it. She also said, on a day I wasn’t her nurse, I walked into her room, looked at her PCA pain pump, and then walked out. (It is hospital policy that two nurses check the settings of a PCA, and that is EXACTLY what I did.)

Her complaints were vague, to say the least, and in no way reflected the CARE I gave her. She seemed like someone scorned or rejected.

At first I was angry because I had been nothing but caring, kind, and compassionate to her. But I began to wonder if maybe somewhere I had crossed a line with her and she saw me as more than just her nurse.

Now I feel like I need to be cautious when dealing with my patients. I never know what they’re really thinking or capable of saying about me–even if I give the very best care.

I was wondering if anyone had any feedback on this or had similar experiences and how they dealt with it.

On one level, it’s a lot of fun, because there’s great camaraderie. They’re learning just like we (new nurses) are. We ask them questions, and they ask us questions. Sometimes we even step in and offer advice when they’re doing a procedure wrong, or point out when they’ve forgotten something, like walking onto a transplant floor without precautions like a contact gown or gloves. (Though I know the patient is our primary concern and I should raise such an issue with an attending, it’s much more intimidating. And I often falter.)

The problem with working with residents is that some nurses cross a “professional” boundary by spending a lot of time flirting with the residents and responding to the residents’ innuendos. Some even develop romantic relationships, which can lead to awkward moments when the break-up happens . . . or the resident falls for more than one nurse. It turns nurse against nurse; they sabotage each other to make the other look foolish. It’s extremely grade school. I feel like I’m stuck in an episode of “Grey’s Anatomy.”

I’m wondering how some of you have dealt with this situation. In your opinion, are nurses too friendly with residents?

Shows like Grey’s Anatomy, and older ones like ER, often portray the tension (sexual and otherwise) of medical colleagues in the hospital environment. If only my Peds-ICU stint had been so exciting!

The shows do raise some good questions, though:

Does dating co-workers (a nurse dating a resident, for example) ever really pan out, given the pressures of hospital environment? Should new and younger nurses fraternize with young residents? Or does it create a lack of boundaries and the necessary professionalism needed for patient care?

I look forward to reading your posts.