What do you do when an instructor singles you out?
She makes me write extra papers and redo all of my skills. She ignores me in clinical. When she pays attention to me, she only points out my failures. She threatens to dismiss me from the program if I don't meet her unrealistic expectations. She reprimands me for things that she completely contradicts at a later date--and then reprimands me for following the original rule I was taught.
I've gone to the dean, who has told me to put up with it if I want to graduate.
What do I do now?
Helen
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October 4th, 2007 at 8:13 pm
Did you go to the Dean of your program or the Dean of students? Many students confuse these two. I would go to the Dean of students but make sure you bring documentation to back up your claims.
October 5th, 2007 at 7:51 am
If what you are saying is true it sounds to me like you are being bullied. The problem with bullies is that they can pick their victims for no apparent reason. Gary and Ruth Namie (2003) define workplace bullying as “the repeated mistreatment of one employee targeted by one or more employees with a malicious mix of humiliation, intimidation and sabotage of performance.”
So what can you do?
1. Record your experiences in a personal diary and reflect upon your experiences using a reflective cycle (such as Gibbs).
2. Decide whether or not to fight back. Talk to someone about this first, Sometimes doing nothing is the best course of action to take.
3. If you do decide to do something about it then make it public. But first, confront your instructor with your diary, ask them to reflect upon their actions, ask them to justify their actions and ask them what can they do to help you.
If that fails, talk to your fellow students, do they have similar experiences with that instructor? Talk to your student representative, do they have history of bullying by that instructor? Once you have a portfolio of evidence then go back to the dean and ask them to review your findings and ask them what they can do about it.
If you do decide to keep a diary then please remember the following points:
A. Be Rational. People like to hear the reasons why events occur. A key part of being rational is telling the story in a linear fashion, so keep a diary of your experiences.
B. Express Emotions Appropriately. The most credible narratives are those which capture and communicate the emotionality of the bullying experience without displaying the emotions described.
C. Provide Consistent Details. A number of specific, clearly articulated and memorable details regarding experiences with the bully and your own perceptions and reactions are deemed most credible.
D. Be Relevant. Believable stories are relevant and to the point. Credible stories of bullying focus primarily on the bully’s behavior and reactions.
E. Emphasize Your Own Competence. Doing so helps establish the fact that the bullying is not a result of poor performance on the job.
F. Show Consideration for Others’ Perspectives. Believable stories are the ones that attempt to understand why you have been victimized by this individual.
G. Be Specific. Effective communicators use concrete, specific language that renders your explanations clear and easily understood.
October 5th, 2007 at 10:03 am
I would start by taping her classes. I would also check your states law about taping conversations, In most it is permissable if one of the parties knows about it then when you felt you had adequate proof I would add this to the diary and take it to the Dean of students.
Be certain you do have the proof you need before persuing this further also other students who could back you up would be helpful.
Take an impartial person with you if you decide to speak to her. People who bully do not like witnesses.
October 8th, 2007 at 12:39 pm
what the dean said i dont find that accepectable at all. I would think the dean would be there for the student and not condone the behavor that the teacher is doing. The ohter posters made very good points I would take the advice of them. Let us know how it goes.
October 9th, 2007 at 10:07 pm
My teachers singled me out, also. They were just plain mean. They were poor examples of teachers and community leaders. I kept a diary and stayed in touch with students who also had similiar experiences and went to the dean of students with the evidence. One specific teacher’s contract was not renewed…actually, two teachers’. It is difficult for academia to dethrone one of their own.
October 31st, 2007 at 7:23 pm
This was happening to my adopted daughter while she was in nursing school. Also the teacher had the help of some of the other students. I went to the school and confronted all of them and the bullying stopped. I think you need to have someone with you and confront the teacher…
November 3rd, 2007 at 12:28 am
You need to follow the chain of command. Confront her with a witness. Then the program coordinator, then the dean of the program and up. You don’t want to burn any bridges, you have to stay in this program. Print any email communications you may have with her to use as evidence when you speak with people. I wish you luck… I don’t know why nurse educators always try to eat their young.
November 4th, 2007 at 11:09 pm
Helen, not to SOUND insensitive but THAT’S LIFE. You won’t always have a dean to report it to. Let her ignorant acts be the fuel for your fire; don’t let her acts rain on or water your fire out. My instructor tried that with me, but every chance I got I studied, knew the all the answers before she finished her sentences. Soon thereafter, she couldn’t help but to love me because I wouldn’t allow her to steal my joy and make me quit.
I later was offered a job to work with her because of the approach I took. I did confront her once I was licensed and she said her RATIONALE was “You were too gifted to sit quietly in the crowd, and I forced you outta that shy box and mold you into an AGGRESSIVE, COMPETENT, AND FEARLESS RN!” Stay encouraged and know that it’s not what she calls you, it’s what you answer to.
Liz, Hollywood, FL
November 5th, 2007 at 2:49 pm
Dear Helen,
Many years ago while in Nursing School I had the same problem as you. This one med-surg nursing instructor did not like me. I spoke to several of my friends about it and they agreed. Some saw her in action. I kicked it up a notch and spoke to some other instructors. That might be a key for you…….you have other instructors who know you and your work. This one instructor can not ruin your career. Study as hard as you can and pass every test in this particular area (that is what I did).
My witch instructor made my life uncomfortable for a few hours a week. It did not last forever. Keep that in mind. Study hard…do the very best you can do…get support from friends/family and before you know it the term will be over and you will have a new instructor.
Good luck.
http://dianej.wordpress.com
December 4th, 2007 at 2:51 pm
This is something nurses are infamous for, its called “eating your young.” Its a lateral aggression that too many nursing students and new graduate nurses are feeling. My advise to you is hold on tight! If you want it bad enough you just work past the people that give you grief, and shove it in their face graduation day!!