advertise with us find a job post your topic join the community log in
Rookie Wit & Wisdom
“My Private Parts Are Bleeding!”

As a traveling nurse, I was sent to check a patient who was close to dying. The night prior to my arrival, he had gone to the ER to have a Foley inserted.

When I arrived at the patient's home, his wife greeted me with, "Oh, nurse, I am so glad you are here! My husband needs to move his bowels, and I cannot lift him onto the commode."

As I was transferring the man, bright red blood started flowing around the outside of the catheter. He saw the blood and, you guessed it, started to panic and turn pale. I thought he was literally going to die in my arms. But I focused my energy on administering basic first aid.

Since he was hemorrhaging from his “private” body part, I grabbed a washcloth from his bedside table and quickly applied pressure to stop the bleeding. (Just imagine the scene.....his wife is watching me transfer her husband with my hand firmly holding his private part.)

Instantly, my face turned red, and I said to the patient and his wife, "If my husband could see me right now, he might wonder about my job." Everyone started to laugh, and with the laughter my patient stopped panicking! We successfully completed the transfer, and the bleeding stopped.

The following weekend, he was on my assigned schedule. At this point he had lapsed into a coma, and his family was in town to be near him during this difficult time.

During my visit, I discussed with them the importance of talking with their father—I believed he could still hear. The wife said, "Yes, you are right. When I told him the blond nurse was scheduled for today, he got a smile on his face." I turned red with embarrassment.

His wife regaled her children with the story of what had happened that day with their father. His recently divorced son said, "Gee, how can I get this service?"

"You need to be on Medicare." I said.

His mother interjected, "Son, you know you have the same name as your father. Would you like to borrow his Medicare card?" We all laughed together.

Keep Smiling!

Read more Rookie Wit & Wisdom articles

4 Responses to ““My Private Parts Are Bleeding!””

  1. cohen312 Says:

    cute story!…made me smile!

  2. Cherrie Says:

    Very nice story! I couldn’t help but smile.

  3. Abeba Says:

    nice story.

  4. Amanda Says:

    Proves that in our line you have to have a sense of humor!

Leave a Reply

search realityrn

sign up for weekly cartoons, tips, and blog posts
first name
last name

Register to win a pair of RX Medical Silver Fox Crocs

Nursing Jobs