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Interacting With Patients
You Know You’re a Nurse If…

Congratulations! It’s Nurses Day. You’ve made it through another year—or perhaps you’re inching your way through your freshman year. While you’ve experienced the joy of changing patients’ lives, you no doubt have encountered daily struggles and frustrations that most people in other professions would crumble because of.

Enjoy a hearty chuckle at the fun poked at the not-so-glamorous parts of nursing. The list has been around for a while—and you probably have your own to add to it.

You know you're a nurse if...
• You would like to meet the inventor of the call light some night in a dark alley.
• Almost everything can seem humorous...eventually.
• You can identify different diarrhea scents.
• You wash your hands BEFORE you use the bathroom.
• You check the caller ID on your day off to see if anyone from the hospital is trying to call and ask you to work.
• Discussing bodily fluids over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you.
• You think that caffeine should be available in IV form.
• You get an almost irresistible urge to stand and wolf your food even in the nicest restaurants.
• You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if you say, “It’s unusually quiet around here today."
• You have had a patient look you straight in the eye and say, "I have no idea how that got stuck in there!"
• You notice that you are using more four-letter words than you even knew before you started nursing.
• When someone asks you for a pen you can find at least four of them on you.
• You live by the motto "To be right is only half the battle; to convince the doctor is more difficult."
• You've told a confused patient that your name was that of your coworker and to holler if they need help.
• Your bladder can expand to the size of a Winnebago's water tank.
• You find yourself checking out other customer's veins in grocery waiting lines.
• You avoid unhealthy looking shoppers in the mall for fear that they will drop near you and you'll have to do CPR on your day off.
• Your finger has gone places you never thought possible.
• You have seen more penises than any prostitute.

Read more Interacting With Patients articles

3 Responses to “You Know You’re a Nurse If…”

  1. cohen312 Says:

    HAPPY NURSES DAY/WEEK!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. LizFeelsGood Says:

    You think having someone poo on your shoes is part of a ‘normal’ days work – and can laugh about it within 30 minutes.

  3. Holly Says:

    You view unhealthy habits in other people as job security.

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